Sunday, 3 June 2012

Porn


Porn.  A multi-billion dollar industry, and yet crouched in mystery.  If it enters the realm of public discourse, it is usually discussed fairly negatively.  We talk about addiction to porn.  We talk about porn stars with a mixture of contempt, confusion and condescension.  If I talk to friends about porn, that discourse does not go deep, and it elicits laughter borne out of ill-disguised shame.  At best, it is viewed as a form of safe sex, or a substitute for the real thing.  But what if I were to say unapologetically that porn is fabulous and that I revere porn stars?

One place that I have witnessed an unabashed love of porn  is on the amateur porn website X-Tube.  That site has thousands of horny guys (and gals) posting sexual clips of themselves.  Some relish in being watched, while others relish watching.  (Whether I am on the site or not is my own little secret).  In reading people’s profiles, I am thrilled at the unapologetic love of all things sex that I read.  Porn is a favourite of many members, obviously.  And they say so without shame.  It takes guts to put yourself out there, to celebrate your sexuality in a public forum.  X-Tube features people who could be your neighbour doing it all – self-sucking, eating their own loads, fucking bareback, fucking with condoms, solos, groups, verbal scumbags talking dirty while jerking off, smoking, spitting, pissing – you name it.  It runs the gamut and any one can be a porn star.

But what of real, paid porn stars?  I am so grateful to every porn star whom I’ve ever seen work for the camera.  Beyond the edge of mainstream respectability, they provide a service that keeps me sane.  To me, they are mental health care providers, because without porn, I might implode.  The release that I get watching a pro do his thing keeps me from hooking up every night with strangers.  Or turning to food to fill the longing.  (Without porn, I’d surely eat instead and considering the power of my sexuality, I’d no doubt weigh a good 300 pounds).  What in god’s name did people do before porn?  Perhaps we don’t miss what we never knew.

The porn that works for me is not the romantic kind with soft lighting and pretty music playing in the background.  For me, skinheads spitting and pissing on each other, ending with a gang bang hits the spot.  Treasure Island Media is one site that offers true raunch.  Cum-eating, felching, bareback, gang-bangs.  The actors look like real people, not models, though many are hotter than any model I’ve seen.

I, like many other people, wonder – how did these actors get into this line of work?  What was the deciding factor that made them say yes to having sex on camera?  In reading an autobiography by porn actress Monica Mayhem, she relates that sometimes the biggest decisions in life – like the decision to enter porn – is made somewhat spontaneously, without great consideration of the ramifications.  Do men go into porn for different reasons than women?  There is a presumption that women enter into the profession out of desperation, or after having experienced abuse.  Is it the same for men?  Does watching porn then imply implicit guilt on our part, as we objectify these gods of the naked screen?  Or does every porn star have a different story to tell, and a different reason for doing what they do?  Does presuming that they go into the profession for unhealthy reasons reflect our own bias and shame towards porn and sexuality and its expression?  Or are we naively making excuses to keep watching?

That glorious, filthy site, Treasure Island Media, does not have its models wear condoms.  They risk their health by making these movies for us.  It seems a tragedy then that we would condescend to the models, for doing what we, in our deepest fantasies, would like to do (though on X-Tube, clearly many have been there, done that).   To loosely quote from Star Trek, the porn actors on Treasure Island Media go “where no man has gone before.”   The argument often stated is that by watching bareback porn, we will become desensitized to its dangers and try it.  This has not proven to be a true adage for me.  My handful of rare instances of bareback sex had absolutely nothing to do with having watched it on a screen.  Other psychological factors and needs were at play.  But has it proved true for others?  And so, I choose, for now, to watch porn, but insist on raising the actors up onto a pedestal, for doing what I can’t or won’t myself.  They incarnate what may be the most powerful force of all – the sexual urge.




1 comment:

  1. Amen Jason, well wriiten, it takes real guts to say what we all are thinking! Your fellow Bator.

    Dale

    ReplyDelete